What books I read in 2021 and why?

 

Well, for somebody who is an avid reader, and a fierce advocate for reading…. The answer is quite simple. NONE! Not even one. Even during lockdown I just couldn’t face it. So writing this piece makes me feel like a bit of a fraud and a phony.

 

I did try to red fiction. I started a few books, and I put them down. my books of choice are usually around entrepreneurs, business magnates, and trailblazers in their spaces. Because they all have so much that we can all learn from them.

 

Perhaps its now time to make a commitment, to myself and to those around me, that 2022 will be the year I bring my reading back to life. Instead of reading, I have been watching television. Hours and hours of nonsense, of reality shows based in countries I don’t live in, escapism at its finest. And yet I have a perfectly wonderful reality. I love my job, I adore my family, and have the most amazing partner. So what on earth am I escaping from?

 

Well, for me, it seems quite simple. I am running away from war, from covid, from death, greed and destruction. How much are we as human beings supposed to endure all at the same time? we already live in a country where devastation and poverty and corruption is part of our everyday narrative. Reality, for the past 2 years, has been incredibly harsh to exist in.

 

But today I avow that I will rediscover my love and passion for reading. I have  book entitled The Mastery of Love, by Don Miguel Ruiz, that has been peering at me from my bookshelf or literal years. And that is my first commitment. That within the next 2 weeks, I will pop the cherry and I will get back into the saddle of the world I once loved.

 

Because we have to. We need to get back up, we need to dust ourselves off, and we need to be better, for ourselves, and for the environment around us that we can control. After all, that’s all we can do.

Overcoming bad habits

I think before we can talk about overcoming them, we need to identify them.

 

For example, if I chew my nails and it doesn’t bug me at all, is it really a bad habit?

 

Are bad habits only those things we ourselves identify as being bad for us, or is it also those around us?

 

I googled the definition and it simply states:

A bad habit is a negative behaviour pattern. Common examples include: procrastination, overspending and nail-biting.

 

So I can say, straight off the bat, that I bite my nails, I smoke, and I procrastinate. Just sitting down to write this very piece, ironically, took way longer than it should have. And how do I overcome my bad habits? I find ways around them. I put tips on my nails, so that I cannot bite them. I make lists and allocate timeslots, so that I cannot shirk the more arduous tasks. I mean, we all do it. We would much rather stall on the tasks that make us think, be vulnerable, or involve a lot of meticulous detail. Because the other stuff is just easier. Right? WRONG! The more we avoid, and deny, and shirk, the more scary these monsters become for us to overcome and confront instead of just approaching them as the next on our task list.

 

What about your smoking, you may ask… well, my smoking is an awful habit. A crutch. Something that affects those around me, and that affects my health. And yet, I have been unable to overcome it.  I think that to overcome the habit, one has to have a need or desire to, that is greater than the habit at hand. And for now, my need and my want is just not greater

 

Do you have any tips, or any habits that you have overcome?

How to stay motivated despite obstacles in your personal and work life

  

Motivation is something that we require all through our lives. As children, as teenagers, and as adults. To do well, to prosper, to rebel, to succeed, to learn, to be healthy, even to crawl.

 

Its an innate desire in us to be more. To not just lie, but to sit. To not just sit, but to crawl, and then to walk.

 

When we start school, we don’t just want to be in the next Grade. We want to be in the next chapter. Grown up. In high school. A teenager. A teacher. We have this desire, and this desire fuels our motivation.

 

We grow into young adults. We see people driving beautiful cars, with lovely homes of their own. Dressed in gorgeous clothing. This motivates us to become employed. To do well in our employment, and to earn more. Perhaps this motivates us to study, so that we can afford what these other people have to, and be afforded their opportunities.

 

Possibly, material wealth is not something that you aspire to. Maybe you dream of travelling. Helping those less fortunate. Your values are what will motivate you to get involved. To say something. To speak up. You may have people in your family, or community, who need your assistance by means of mentorship. Guidance. This may motivate you to reach out. To dedicate time and resources to build them up.

 

Whatever it is that speaks to your heart, your values and your family history, is what will be your motivation.  It gets more complicated though. We forget that we need to have holistic motivation. We focus on one area and forget the others. We become so focused on helping others, we forget about helping ourselves. So driven to making our head smart and excelling in the workplace that we forget about our physical wellbeing. Motivation needs to be on being the best person you can be. In every aspect of your human experience.

 

And so, what motivates me?  At 45, I have realised that I have to be a whole human being. And not a one sided human doing. Being able to achieve as much as I possibly can on this trip in this human experience, means I have to look after the whole of Hayley. Body, mind and soul. What keeps me motivated? Coaches. Mentors. Self-study, and being inspired. Setting goals; for the day, the week, the month and the year. And although I lose focus and my way, always coming back to those and remembering just who I am, where I have been, and where I want to go.

 

Be kind to yourself