Make a Difference in Someone’s Life

When I looked at this topic, I thought – that’s easy enough. But then I stopped, and the overthinking began. You see, it is simple to make a difference in someone’s life. But I wanted to write about the single biggest effect that you can have on somebody’s life, with the smallest effort or input. Because we want it to be easy, not challenging, and we want to do it with a happy and open heart.

And so, this morning in the shower, it came to me. The biggest and most effective difference you can make in someone’s life, with the smallest effort from you, is to be truthful. To be honest and transparent and gentle with this truth.

So what do I mean? I mean for many of us, we carry around doubts. We carry around insecurities and hurt. And many of these are caused by not knowing. Not knowing why a relationship ended. Not knowing why a friend no longer calls. Being unsure as to why a parent has always held a grudge. Being uncertain as to what caused a rift between you and your sibling. And many times, the old cliché would have applied. It wasn’t you, it was THEM. It was their hurt, it was their doubt, it was their anger or their jealousy, and it actually had very little to even do with you.

I had a friend once who didn’t speak to me for a year, because she was jealous of my parenting skills and abilities. Not that I am saying I am a perfect parent, I am flawed simply in my humanity. But I do try. Every day. And she just resented me because of that and ended up distancing herself for a full 365 days. In that time I was tormented as I didn’t know the possible cause. Imagine my surprise, twelve months later, when I realised that it actually had not been anything horrible I had done to her, or any hurt I had inflicted on her, but her own issue?

And so today, reflect. Who can you unburden by revealing a small truth? Who can you appease with a tiny revelation of information? Be kind to one another. Make a difference in someone’s life.

Monday motivational: If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else - Booker T Washington

Monday motivational: I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough, we must do - Leonardo da Vinci

Monday motivational: Limitations live only in our minds. But if we use our imaginations, our possibilities become endless - Jamie Paolinetti

Being a mom

Being a mother is about so much more than what you imagine. It's about selfless love. It's about never coming first and always coming last. It's about never getting and always giving. It's about sacrifice. It's about fear for the safety of your children. It's about sleepless nights. It's about doing without so they can have. It's about learning to listen when you just want to bury your head under the blankets.  But it's also about so much fulfillment. So much purpose, so much achievement. So much pride, love, appreciation. It changes every part of who you started out as. 

I have been a single mom for fourteen years and it's been a struggle every single day. But I would never even change a thing. I am so grateful to the women in my life who have loved me enough to sacrifice for me, to teach me, to grow me, to mould me.  

To my mom, my aunties, my grannies, my coaches, my mentors, my peers, my ex bosses, my friends, my cousins,  my sisters, my colleagues, my adopted family. I thank every one of you for teaching me. For leading me. For helping me up when I never thought I could walk again.  Bless you all on Mothers Day. For being a mother is not about birthing somebody.  It's about loving somebody enough to put them first. Just for a day. An hour. A minute. For listening when they need you to and showing up when they need it the most. 

Thank you for moulding me into a great woman. Here's to you. Happy mothers day.

Monday motivational: You take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing, no one to blame - Erica Jong